Khyber Pass Dispatches

Monday, February 28, 2005

Felt nothing but the heat

Hi all. Our systems have been up and down like a yo-yo, so I haven't had a chance to get on here at all. Been able to e-mail Viv first thing in the morning, and that's it. No, didn't get anything on the quake, it was too far away, I think.

Getting ready to start planning my escape from this lovely garden spot. I've got most everything sorted, planning wise, I just have to implement it all.

I've gotten a couple of packages since I last talked on here both from Mom and Dad. Cease fire on the packages, as they probably won't get here before I leave if mailed out now.

The weather has turned hot...d*mn hot. Like, remind me I'm in a desert hot. So I'm sweating to death, even though I'm sitting here in a T-shirt (vest for all you english speakers). Absolutely looking forward to the next month (heavy sarcastic emphasis)

Have not heard anything vis-a-vis Jason. Would like his contact info, or whatever.

Will talk when I get a chance.


Take care of yourselves, and each other.

Myron

Sunday, February 27, 2005

Long week

Hello everyone, how are you all?. It's been the longest week for some reason, seemed never ending. Most of the country had snow exept our little bit as usual. It's been bitterly cold with a nasty wind. Poor Viv doesn't have much luck with NTL . She's now without house phone and tv. the caravan site opens tomorrow but unless the weather improves a good deal it will be a few weeks yet before we go . John did you feel anything of the earthquake Ann wants to know. Dad and I have been laying track , taking it up and laying it again to get it right. It takes time but it's fun . I'm looking forward to doing the scenery and models . I do waffle but not a lot is going on at present. Hope you're both ok Doc and Margarette. I have to get blood pressure checked tomorrow it's running a bit high. Take care , everyone sends love Mum G.

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Bl**dy H*ll!

OK...I knew I'm getting old, but I just hate getting slapped in the face with the fact.

We're currently short-handed (ok, shorter-handed than we normally are, which already is pretty short). My soldier is on leave, so we're down one guy during days. I was getting ready to go to lunch, and I went to tell my Captain that I was going. He asked me if there was anyone in the shop, which irritated me no end. We work with classified information, on the computers in printouts, etc. Rule number one, make sure your classified is either secured (like in a safe), or someone is watching it at all times. We don't have a safe, so of course someone has to stay and watch it. Of course I wasn't going to just up and leave it.

So grumbling to myself, I walked out of the office. The grumbling went like this:

"Is there anyone in the office?? Of course there's someone in the office. What, do I look like an irresponsible git?? I've been in this business for (quick mental calculation) 19 years and....."

Suddenly, deep inside my brain, something threw a switch (one of those big heavy Frankenstein breaker switches, I imagine). Synapses fired, electro-chemical gates opened and memory areas were accessed.

Oh, sh*t...

I've forgotten an anniversary, actually TWO anniversaries.

18 February 1986...I signed up with the Air National Guard.
21 February 1989...I signed up with the US Air Force.

I have been in this business for 19 years. And I completely forgot my anniversaries.

Somebody have a drink for me in celebration.

I am getting old.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Monday, February 21, 2005

Panic stations for snow

Hello everyone , as you can see by title the weather men keep forecasting snow , bad road conditions, ice, and anything else they can think of , but all we've had are a few snowy sleety showers. Dad's training course was a waste of time 'they couldn't teach him anything. I've been to Anglesey today helping Viv count postcards and things, ready for her stock take tomorrow. We started laying track on the train board John and already its been taken up and re-laid. It keeps us out of mischief. Hope alls well with you Doc and Margarette , I must admit to being ready for some sunshine and warm weather so we can get to the caravan for the weekends.That's enough of my rabbiting .Take care of yourselves . Love and best wishes from everyone Mum G.

Nuts???

No, Dad, not nuts...eccentric, maybe (Ok, maybe very eccentric), but not nuts.

Viv's birthday has come and gone. For all those on the other side of the pond, I bought Viv something very special. She is now the proud owner of a whole square foot of land on the Glencairn estate in the Highlands of Scotland. Through some bizarre and archaic custom or law, this allows her to legally call herself Lady Glencairn (although she is not royalty). Well, she always wanted to live in Scotland, so its a start. And no "Lady and the Tramp" jokes, please. Viv and I have already beaten that horse to death, and thrown in a couple of thermo-nuclear devices for good measure.

Last couple of days have been really sh*te. Our work LAN has been down this weekend, and when it was up, our external connection has been down. So I've been not as productive as I could have, although I have done some work on writing up what I do around here.

Just about over the sinus infection, I think. It never really got past the scratchy throat, but completely drained me. Now we've been told we have to start taking malaria meds. Fun.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Friday, February 18, 2005

Happy Birthday Darling!!!!

Today is Viv's birthday (how come I can't get Claire Grogan singing "Happy Birthday" out of my mind??). Sent her an e-card and two e-mails this morning, and Mum has her present. Don't know if everything has come back after you sent it off, Mum. I guess Viv will tell me when I talk to her tonight. Hope she likes it.

Geez, Dad, I thought I was long winded when I get going. Guess I know where I get it from.

Please pass on Jason's details when you get them.

Have to get to work now.

Take care of yourselves and each other. I'm thinking about you, darling, and have your picture as my wallpaper today.

Myron

Thursday, February 17, 2005

My captain needs sleep

After this mornings vitriolic outburst (I'm not sorry for it), I figured you could do with some humour.

Our boss is a workaholic, who gets about four to five hours of sleep a night. He's really good about making sure everyone else gets rest, but him.

Today he came into the office with a big bubblewrap envelope in his hand. Myself and Greg (one of the Army guys) were the only ones here. The following conversation ensued:

Capt: Anyone have a pair of scissors? I need to open this (holds up envelope).
Me: Yeah. (Reaching into pocket for my handy-dandy swiss army knife)
Greg: Here you go. (Handing Capt. a Gerber multitool with knife blade)
Capt: (Cuts into envelope, and extracts ream of paper that he begins to read) Where's Adam and Kendrick?
Me: Adam went to Camp Justice, and Kendrick is having a cr*p.
Capt: (Still reading papers) Why??
Me: Umm...err...because he'd be full of cr*p otherwise!
I look at Greg, Greg looks at me, and we burst out laughing.

Later, Greg made the comment that the Captain sounded like his four-year old niece ("Where are you going?" "To the store." "Why?" "To get food." "Why?" "Because we don't have any." "Why?" "Because we ate it." "Why?" "Because we were hungry." "Why?"......)

Oh, and the food is definitely going down hill. The local version of salad. Shredded lettuce, sliced carrots, and sliced pickled gherkins. Dill pickled gherkins. Lots of dill pickled gherkins.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

There they go again...

I don't know if this has hit the headlines yet, but it will.

Some soldiers in Iraq have been taking pictures of dead Iraqis, and posting them on a website, with cute captions attached (like a guy who had his arm blown off having a caption attached saying "Give this guy a hand!!"). There are even worse ones than that on the site as well.

WHAT IN H*LL ARE THESE PEOPLE THINKING!!!!

We are here trying to fight insurgents and win the hearts and minds, and these idiots are treating it like a college frat party. First the Abu Ghurayb picture, then the Bucca DF mud-wrestling, and now this.

I was talking with the NCOIC here last night, who's been in a bit over 20 years, so we came in at the same time. He thinks, someone somewhere is screwing up in these kids training. They are not emphasising that little actions affect the big picture. I know what he means, because I've seen it in the kids coming in now.

Meanwhile, these idiots who are supposed to be fighting this insurgency conflagration, are instead throwing gasoline onto the fire.

I don't think he's that stupid, but tell Jason if he does anything like this, I will personally come over and repeatedly apply my size 9s to his butt. The steel-toed size 9s.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

I'm not dead yet...

Still have a bit of a scratchy throat and am all sinusy, although I went last night without decongestants, and it didn't do any harm. Hopefully I've fought it off.

Had a very surrealistic experience on Valentines Day. Went to lunch to find all the tables decked out with red satin table cloths, heart shaped paper-lace doilies, and little strips of paper with inspirational love messages on them. Had T-bone steaks, lobster tails, breaded prawns, and other goodies. Couldn't decide if they were taking the Mick, or if they were trying to boost morale. If they were trying to do the latter, IT DIDN"T WORK.

Can't believe they are actually sending Pop to a course to learn how to load trucks. That is funny.

Starting to get out of the winter season and into heat. Everyone is saying we will have dust storms soon, so I'm going to have to get ready for that.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

It's snowing

Hello all, just sat down to write and looked out of the window to see it snowing. For once I hope it won't be much as Dad has to go to Carlisle today for a training course. You should have a laugh when I tell you it's on how to load a lorry. How are you all?. We've had bitterly cold winds but supposed to be coming milder. Vivs very busy but things should soon stsrt slowing down for her. I can't say I understand politics much John but all your info was enlightening (after all we hear in the news). Hope you're feeling better. Everyone sends love . Mum G . by the way it's stopped snowing. Doc and Margarette hope you're both ok and keeping well wrapped up in the cold. Love Mary and Gus.

Monday, February 14, 2005

Still here...

...and still alive. Fighting it bit by bit, although still congested and have a scratchy throat, but I'm not draining yet. Probably more information than was needed.

Do we know where Jason has gone? I've got tabs on a few Marine units, so I have a fair idea where he could be going, but not sure if I've got all of them.

Anyway, as today's Valentines Day, here's wishing my lovely Viv a good day.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Suffering...I think

Hi all! Well, somethings going around the palace, and I've caught it. Had a scratchy throat for the past few days, and started feeling all sinusy yesterday. Couple of other people have something similar, so its not just me. Went and got some decongestants last night, so I'm working on fighting it, but its tough. Hasn't hit full bore yet, but I'm waiting for it.

Yesterday hit the 8 week point, so time is getting on. Busy at the moment, I have three projects on, plus my regular workload. Also trying to write up everything that I do, in detail, so the guy I'm leaving knows what I do, and how to do it.

Anyway, I'd better get going.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Ha!

Will start looking for battery manufacturers to invest in. Would like to see the re-charge attachment for the sex drive...or maybe not. Viv's birthday is on the 18th, not the 19th, although that was probably a typo.

Got a further e-mail regarding the re-assignment back home. My boss has confirmed he has no knowledge. As I said before though, communication at the JAC is absolutely sh*te, so it wouldn't suprise me to get back and have a new job.

Mum, tell everyone I said hi.

Less than 60 days!!!!!!

Anyway, have to get going.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Happy Birthday

Happy birthday for yesterday Doc, sorry it's a day late but didn't know til i saw it on the blog today. Hope you had a good day and that alls well with you and Margarette. We arranged a surprise party for Gus on saturday evening with some old friends and most of the family . Would have been complete if John , Margarette and you could have been there. It was very hard keeping it a secret from him. Viv is snowed under at work ( no pun intended ). We went to see the snowdrops on Sunday, they are very pretty . Hope you're ok John everyone sends love .Take care of yourselves love from Mum G

Happy (belated) birthday

Many apologies! For some reason, I thought it was later in the month. Mea culpas! I did remember it, or rather, that we were near it, as I asked Viv last night about whether she had gotten a present for you, and she told me it had been sorted out. Again, apologies!

Yet another twist in the going home saga. Last week, one of the JAC crew popped through here going from point a to b. While talking to him, I found out that there is a rumour of a list with all of us on it, and what positions/jobs we are going back to when we get home. Supposedly, the Afghani crowd had a copy of the list, but not us.

Yesterday, I got an e-mail with a forwarded answer to a question one of the guys up north had posed back to the JAC. The JACs answer contained intimations that such a list did exist, and that alot of us were going back to new jobs. So I shot back an e-mail asking the question about the list. Interestingly, last week I had talked to my office about this topic, and they were unaware of the list (including the boss), although that's not saying much, as communication back there is normally bad, anyway.

So I have no idea what I am going back to at the moment.

Oh, and today is day 119 of my arduous journey. Tomorrow is 60 days and counting!!!!

Myron

Monday, February 07, 2005

News flash.....

Saudi Arabia has potato farms!!!!

Got a packet of crisps today at lunch. On the back it says "Prepared from natural potatoes grown on local farms..." and the crisps are manufactured in Saudi Arabia. Ergo, Saudi Arabia has potato farms!!

Learn something new every day!

Myron

So far from home...

Just so everyone knows...

I'm approximately 2560 miles from home. As the crow flies.

Myron

Saturday, February 05, 2005

Morning off...

Hi all, I got a morning off today. Didn't really need it, but my team insisted (ok, so there's only two on my team, including me). Anyway, I was told to sleep in, but I was wide awake at 0615, so I read for a bit, then went to the gym. Now I'm reading my e-mail and talking to you all.

I will try and explain the whole election situation, and what is happening now in country. I may make some leaps in logic that don't make sense, but I am trying to simplify a complex topic, and some of the bridges along the road from point a to point b I can't talk about for various reasons.

The media has been making a big deal of the whole election turnout, and how many voted. Let me first explain what the elections are about.

These elections were to establish yet another interim government, this time a quasi-democratically appointed one (more on that later). This government and assembly is going to write the constitution which will determine the form and composition of the future final government of Iraq. The constitution will be ratified in October, and elections using the new constitution will take place in December. I am unsure what kind of veto power anyone will have on drafting the new constitution, if any. If it is going to be by majority vote, then there will be problems, if it is by unanimous vote, then I don't see it getting ratified, unless someone holds a gun to their heads and forces them. There are too many divergent interests, old grudges and outright fear which can paralyze the whole system.

The just past elections took this form (I explained it in my last post, but I will clarify some points I glossed over). There was a roll of lists of candidates, somewhere in the neighborhood of 200 lists. They roughly equate to parties, but not quite, although a majority of them were groupings of like minded individuals. Some were local lists, some were presented by nationwide groups. All of them made it on the ballots. The list names, that is, not the actual candidate names. The candidate names were kept secret until the last minute, to prevent insurgents assassinating candidates. As far as I am aware, the polling sites were supposed to have the candidate names at them, not sure if there was one list per station or one list per site. In addition to the name of the list, each list had a number and a symbol. The number was to prevent confusion, as some lists didn't have names. The symbol was for those people who cannot read. Let me emphasise that point, a large minority of the population cannot read. Of all the lists, only a handful had anything remotely resembling campaigning, and Allawi's list was one of them, because he was already a target.

In the run-up to the election, there was the attack on Fallujah. Fallujah is west of Baghdad, and in the heart of the predominantly Sunni area. The population was predominantly Sunni, most of whom were not insurgents. The attack on Fallujah forced most of them out, and a large minority of them have not returned. While the attack prevented the insurgents from controlling the city, it did not eliminate them, as evidenced by Zarqawi popping up again. They simply spread to other areas. What it did do was create even more instability in the west, which wasn't the best place to begin with. Also, there was no election commission presence in the west, because of the instability, so there was no, I repeat, no education program to tell the people about the election, how it was going to work or anything about it. People vaguely knew there was an election, but not what it was for. The west was also the place where most Sunni insurgents are (except for Baghdad), and the Sunni controlled areas were those places where people were being threatened with death.

The demographic situation in the country is quite complex, so I am going to simplify it. In the north you have the ethnic Kurds, whose ethnic boundaries encompass parts of Turkey, Syria, Iran, Georgia, Armenia, and Azerbaijan, as well as Iraq. They have been campaigning for decades for a seperate country (Kurdistan), most countries in the region have savagely oppressed this (the Turks and Iraq in particular), Kurds are generally Sunni Muslims. In the south, you have Shi'a muslims, the same sect as in Iran. You also have two or three of the most sacred Shi'a shrines in the south. In the middle, west of Baghdad, you have Sunni, who held power for the past four decades. They are second in population behind the Shi'a. Their biggest fear is that the Shi'a will come to power and put them to the sword, wipe them out, kill every last one of them, in revenge for the years of oppression. So in the same country, you have a formerly oppressed majority, a formerly oppressive minority, and another minority that wants to secede.

The Shi'a are the key to this whole thing, as they have the greatest voting block. The most respected Shi'a by far is the Grand Ayatollah Sistani, who is a Shi'a cleric. If you take him at face value, he is the best hope for Iraq. He is completely religous, but wants the best for Iraq. He himself is not standing for office, as he feels it is best to not use his religous authority for popular gain, but he is organizing things as best he can for the good of the people. He organzied a coalition list with a broad spectrum of Shi'a, Sunni, religous and secular candidates. And he told his followers it was a sin not to vote.

As for the Sunnis, they resisted the elections (remember their fear). Their former political party (Ba'ath) was outlawed, but the remnants remained. They figured their best hope was to make the elections invalid. From their point of view, they are being occupied by the coalition, and being manipulated to vote in a puppet which will be controlled by the US. In this scenario, they consider the elections invalid. So their main political and religous groups told their people not to vote. After all, how can you have true democracy if a sizable portion of the second largest group is not represented? (I seem to remember a revolution being started over taxation without representation..)

As of yet, the true ratio of people who voted to the population eligible to vote is undetermined. What is being trumpeted right now is the ratio of registered voters who voted. As a distinction, outside of the country, only around 10% of those eligible registered. Inside the country, you are probably talking around 65-70% of eligible voters were registered. Those people not registering was not entirely their choice. In some cases they had no choice, due to political and insurgent interference.

During the elections, a vast majority of the Sunni didn't vote, because they were threatened with death, because they were afraid, because they had been displaced (Fallujah) or because they had been told not to. I have not seen actual ratios of eligible voters voting, but I would be highly suprised if it exceeded 15% for the sum total of Sunni areas. The greatest voting block will have been the Shi'a. This whole situation is roughly analogous to allowing Californians to vote, but having the North East only be able to vote with 15% of their population. Also, because of the way the polls were carried out, people were confronted with a ballot of hundreds of list numbers, but didn't know beforehand who was on the different lists. Kind of like having the Greater Atlanta Party show up on a ballot in Georgia, or the Greater Anglia Party show up on a ballot in the UK, with no prior campaigning. The entire ballot was like that, except for Sistani's list and Allawi's list, both of which had been publicised, (Sistani has a media office and Allawi has control of the government media). That is why I called it a quasi legal government in the beginning couple of paragraphs.

Yes it was a remarkable achievement and required great bravery for people to have actually voted. What annoys me, and the point of writing this whole thing for an hour now, is the media trumpeting it as a great success, and how true democracy has come to Iraq, without telling the whole story.

Sorry for the diatribe.

Myron

Friday, February 04, 2005

a week later

Hello all , didn't realise it's been almost a week since i last got on here. Hows you John , your bit on elections should be put in news. The time is going quick now, hope it is for you . We haven't had snow , in fact violets are out and the birds are starting to build nests . maybe we are all in for a shock. Glad you got back ok Doc and that things were'nt as bad as you thought. It's good Margarettes better. Gus says thanks for the birthday card. Take care everyone sends love and and best wishes Mum G.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Glad you made it back

And I'm glad you're happy with the situation down there. I don't think you are an unhealthy influence, I just think you and Mom feed off each other, when working. One of you is doing something, and the other feels guilty for not doing something, and then it starts snowballing.

I'll have a look at throwing something together on how I see the election when I can, and get that thrown on here.

Anyway, have to get to breakfast.

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Myron

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Foods back

We are back to our monotonous diet again. Saturday and Sunday, we did not have any catering workers due to movement restrictions put in place for the election period, so we had MREs. Actually, it was a welcome break from the regular monotony of the menus here.

I'm going to digress for a moment, and talk about the elections. Everyone here is smart enough to realise that the news services, for the most part, tell only part of the story. As part of my job, I have to collate information from a bunch of different sources, including the news services, which gives me a better aspect on what is closer to the truth. So let me refute some of the reports I heard on Fox and CNN.

70% participation - This magical number was arrived at by asking certain polling stations to estimate the number of people in line at certain times. It does not apply to every area of the country, like the western part, which is mostly Sunni, where I would be suprised if the total reached 20%.

They had a better particpation than the US had at the last election - Yes, but the citizens of the US chose not to particpate out of apathy. The people who didn't participate in the Iraqi elections did so because they were threatened with death.

Free elections - Yes, if you consider there were over 200 lists of candidates (you vote for a list, not an individual candidate, then people are chosen off the list in proportion to the percentage of votes received for the list), and the only lists that were promoted were Allawi's, because he had the media to conduct a campaign, and Sistani's, because he has religous authority among the Shi'a. Nobody knew who was on the other slates, or what their platform was, becasue they were afraid to publicise for fear of being assassinated. Try going in and voting for random candidates next time you vote, and see what happens.

This may sound a bit negative, and the Iraqis did have a choice, but I wouldn't say it was a fair system. So when you are listening to the orgy of self-congratulation about what was achieved, think of the 41+ people who were killed, and the hundreds who were wounded, and think of the people who risked life and limb to vote, and think of all the people who are going to die in the aftermath (everyone who voted has blue stained fingers, and the dye won't come off for three days, its very easy to pick out who voted and kill them). This is a beginning, but its not the beginning of the end....

Myron